UGLY

I have never felt so ugly, or felt so alone, As I sit here on my sofa, my mind begins to roam. But it's not roaming somewhere nice, with happy, fluffy things, My head is in a dark place, with everything that brings! Three mirrors in my bedroom, one down, two to go! I really don't want to see, the image that they show. I look up from my bed, at the mirror on my wall, I stare at its reflection, urging it to fall! I will start at the bottom, and how my feet have changed, So bent and ugly, and completely rearranged. Moving on to legs, useless and pretty dead, If I try to move them, they are like a piece of lead! I look at my stomach, with gratitude and despair, I've got used to the feeding tube, that is always there. Everything I wear, is in a bigger size. As easier to get on, and easier to hide! As I sit all day, I am at risk of sores, Another thing to check, surely nothing more! My hands and arms are thin, and fingers are bent, I force them straight at night, and sleep in a splint! Now for my neck, that pings like elastic, It lists to one side, and the pain is pretty drastic. Onto the worst bit, which is my ugly face, Plain and no make up, and everything out of place. I hate how my hair is, like a scarecrow everyday, No matter how it's brushed, the look won't go away! My colour needs doing, but neck won't hold out that long, All I can say is, I'm glad one mirror is gone. Next topic is my eyes, I feel gratitude and fear, Terrified they will fail, and my dialogue won't be here! But of course they come with issues, and water everyday, But MND tears burn like acid, and I can't wipe them away. "Are you feeling better?" or I hear "How are you? " The answer that I give you, simply won't be true. The mask that I wear, is my favourite place to hide, Because it hides the darkness, that I feel inside!